Helplessly Inlove
by urharmony
Summary: SEMMA. (Set Season 6). Sean was suppose to be perfect. He was charming, overly attractive, and so loving but after he gets out of jail who knew perfect included abusive? Emma finally gets the guts to leave him after an intense heart breaking break up. Come 2 years later, he's tracked her down, knowing she's pregnant. He swears desperately he's changed. Could it be true? ..
1. Please Don't Leave Me

"Wake up, Sean!" Slapping him across the face, Emma gasped in shakily but put on her brave face as he tilted his head to the side, and groaned. She scowled

His eyes squinted against the harsh light that was streaming through their kitchen window before he lifted his head, and looked at her. It took a moment for him to realize that he was sitting in one of the chairs from the kitchen table, and that he couldn't move because his hands were tied to the back of it.

His voice was thick from all of the liquor he had imbibed the night before, and she was sure a hangover was splitting his head open now. "What the fuck are you doing, Em?"

Ever since getting out of prison, Sean loved to drink, and Emma hated him like that. He was violent when he drank, different, and he knew that. Years ago as just kids she told him she didn't like him when he drank because he had ruined Jimmy's party , was mean to her parents, and was just a mess.. and now look at him. More than just a mess. He wasn't HER Sean, not anymore. Not her Prince charming..

Pulling at his restraints, he frowned. When he couldn't move his wrists the slightest bit his expression darkened. "I don't know what the fuck it is you think you're playing at here, but fucking untie me. Now!"

Emma's fists shook to contain the rage inside of her. Reaching out, she slapped him across the face again. Her jaw was set in hard lines as her eyes narrowed. "You don't get to tell me what to do, Sean. Not anymore." She was never a weak girl, she was always strong, and she always loved that Sean's love made her feel more powerful...but not lately. Not anymore. She felt weak. She would NOT be weak.

His head had turned slightly when her palm connected with his cheek, but he quickly looked back at her barely containing his rage. His blue eyes were explosive as he gritted his teeth, trying to keep it together. His eyes cornered when he watched her walk around him, and she grabbed a kitchen towel and rolled it up before turning back to him.

When he turned his head their gazes clashed. Emma looked into his beautiful, fierce eyes, and ached with regret. It was those eyes that had drew her in. Making her weak in ways she couldn't even describe.

Regardless of the fact that he was good looking in a way that was heart stopping, or that he had the physique of a god, it was his eyes that had sealed her fate. They made him appear vulnerable, sweet, and just misunderstood when they looked at you and maybe he use to be, before Peter ruined him and had made Sean street race him. . .ending up almost killing a man and sent to prison. Now these eyes were just a lie, cold, and angry.

She had sworn to herself as she had rubbed the blood away from her mouth while pulling herself off the floor the other day that she would never allow him to hurt her again. It was going to be the last time. She had no more forgiveness inside of her. He had done it 6 times now. The first two she let by..he was frustrated, just out of jail without a job. The third one? He had found out about her and Jay's past. The fourth slap? He had lost his job. The fifth, she wanted him to stop worrying that she was hanging around Peter again. She wasn't.. but Sean was so damn possessive of her now and the sixth time he abused her was last night when she had asked him to stop drinking.

These were the things that ran through her mind as she approached him, and grabbed a fistful of his light brown hair. Yanking his head back, she stared into his face.

"I have given you way more than enough chances, Sean Cameron." she told him softly. "I gave up my pride, my heart, and I didn't listen to my friends when they told me to stay away from you. I gave up my **loyal **boyfriend for you."

His lips pinched, and his eyes narrowed. "I've **always **been loyal to you, Emma. That is such bullshit, and you know it," he growled.

She shook her head as she looked at him. Even now, when he was at her mercy, he was still an arrogant jerk

"You and I both know why you gave all of that shit up, Emma.. You were bored. Bored and unfulfilled by 'Loyal' Peter. I did you a favor by getting you out of there, you should thank me, Peter could never meet your standards."

Emma drew in her breath on a laugh. "_Thank_ you?" Pulling harder on his hair, she yanked his head back further. "I should thank you for what, Sean? Coming back to mess with my head again? Dragging me into a life of constant abuse?" Pointing to her lip that was split but slowly healing from the other day, her expression grew incensed. "Should I thank you for this, Sean?"

For a moment his eyes darted away from hers guiltily, but a scowl soon returned to his face when she pulled his hair viciously. He looked around and noticed his Jack Daniels sitting by the sink and he squinted his eyes seeing she had poured every last drop into the sink. His fists clenched, and it was like right then and there he was having withdrawals like a true alcoholic.

"I'm going to make you pay for every single thing you've done to me this year Sean. I thought this time it'd be different, but jail changed you."

His eyes grew wary, but then he tried not to smirk. "What are you going to do? Slap me to death?"

Dropping her hand away from him, Emma straightened, and looked into his amused face. "That's not a bad place to start," she told him. Raising her arm, she backhanded him across the cheek making his head turn.

When she hit him again she put all her strength behind it. The slight trickle of blood that appeared from the corner of his mouth gave her little satisfaction but her heart still clenched and she tried to swallow the lump in her throat. This man was her first love, first everything, she had even given him her virginity. He had her everything, she was his everything. Why had he changed? Where was HER Sean?

Lifting her other hand, she held the balled up kitchen cloth in front of him. "Open your mouth."

His brows furrowed as he looked at them, and then he raised his angry blue eyes to her. "You are not putting that in my mouth." he looked around, wondering where Spike and Snake were today. Shit, it was a Sunday...they wouldn't be home all day or night. She had really thought this through. He tried not to feel his gut turn about that, and his head was already pounding by the hangover.

Emma tightened her lips as she fought the desire to smile. "Open wide, Sean. Don't make me go outside and hurt your precious car."

Narrowing his eyes at her, Sean reluctantly parted his lips half an inch before grimacing, and closing them again. "This is fucking ridiculous. Let me out of this God damned chair!" Pulling on his restraints, he jerked the chair forward slightly as his anger got the better of him. Never threaten Sean and his cars.. 

Emma happily stuck the rolled up towel into his mouth as he was yelling, and he sat back, huffing and puffing but glaring up at her deadly.

"That's what happens when you don't listen. You would do well to remember that, Sean."

she took a step back. Her hazel eyes were haunted as she looked through him. "Do you remember the first time you told me you loved me, Sean?"

When he nodded brusquely, Emma's eyes narrowed. " I never had a chance of resisting you once you uttered those words...so maybe it's my fault for staying longer than the real Emma Nelson would of ever if anybody else tried to hit me. But you're my weakness.."

His eyes were wary as she was approaching him, she stepped between his legs so that she could look down at him.

"I really loved you, Sean." Reaching up, she slapped him in the face as the tears she had been holding back finally fell. He looked stone cold then, didn't even flinch from the slap until the next one came. Something had been on his mind..

She said 'loved'...did that mean, not anymore?

She watched strangely as he winced the next time as she raised her hand, and his eyes stayed closed, just waiting for it.

"What's wrong, Sean? Can't take a little pain? Do you know how many times I've had to endure this from you. How many bruises I've had to hide after one of your meltdowns? This is nothing. Or how about the times you left hickeys over my neck, knowing I hated it when you did and they hurt? You did it just to show everyone that I belonged to you"

She gripped a fistful of his hair in her hands again, and yanked his head back roughly so that he was forced to look at her.

"Don't you like this, sweetie? Maybe it's because I'm not touching you. You always felt the need to crawl on top of me after man handling me or coming home after a night with Jay. You'd be pissed and have to 'remind' me who I belonged to. Remember?"

Slipping her hand between his legs against his jeans, she ran her hands down the bulge in his pants..hard or not, it was always a bulge..he was a big guy down there..so that couldn't of been the excuse why he had been so mean lately, he didn't need to show her he was a 'man' when he had that to prove it... So why? Why!

"Is this better, baby? Do you _forgive me_ now?"

His blue eyes widened before his brows knitted and he closed his eyes. He then opened them and his scowl told her that he wasn't pleased with her actions but his hardness spoke otherwise.

"Don't be like that, Sean," she looked down and slowly unzipped his pants, too slowly it almost tortured him, " I didn't mean to do it. You just make me so damn crazy.." her doe eyed eyes watched her hand take out his hard member, and she bit her lip as she slowly stroked him but then leaned up a little to whisper in his ear, "You know I love you, baby, I'm only doing this because I can't help myself."

His scowl darkened considerably as she used his own words to torture him. When her fingers quickened against him so that she was rubbing him furiously, Sean's eyes rolled back into his head as he groaned. She was always so fucking good at that and he tried not to think if Jay had taught her when she did it, cause it made him snap.

Emma's hand stilled against him making him whimper. Her fingers lightly drummed against him as she smiled into his face. "You're so hard. You must be really enjoying this. Let me see if I can add to your pleasure."

Emma closed her fist before she punched him in the eye. The sound of her knuckles made a sickening crunch as they connected with the side of his face. After she did it, her eyes widened slightly, and a small laugh escaped her as her breath quickened.

"I can't believe I just did that," she said in amazement.

Sean couldn't believe it either, and his eyes had also grown large as he gazed up at her warily. It had really fucking hurt.

Lifting her fingers to touch the spot where her fist had landed, Sean jerked away from her to avoid her touch and he had almost sobered up completely right then and there.

Dropping her hand, she looked into his face, and felt the irony. "You must be thinking some pretty interesting things right now," she mused aloud. "Now picture a year of me doing this to you, after all the other great years we spent together... and you can imagine how I feel about you right now."

Reaching up again, she lightly ran her thumb over the swollen skin where she'd hit him, and watched as an emotion she didn't recognize passed over Sean's face. Regret? Sorrow? Agony? She wasn't sure. ..it'd been a long time since she seen it.

Slipping on top of him, she settled down until she was perched atop his knees. They were face to face now, and Emma gazed down into her lap for a moment before raising her sad eyes to meet his.

"Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I hadn't gone to Degrassi. What I'd be doing if I had never met you. It makes me wonder if I'd have a better life or still have something missing inside of me because you honestly do feel like my other half...but I c_ouldn't_ stay with you, not when you're like this, not after **this**. It feels good to take back my pride, but I know if I let you go and I stay..you'll try to get back at me won't you?"

Lifting her hands, she placed them on his strong chest as he looked at her with confusion. The heat from his skin radiated into her palms, and she slowly rubbed them up, and down as she continued.

"I use to think about our future together, now I don't because I use to picture your own shop, us married, and our own kids but you could _never _make me happy again could you? let alone be around a _**child."**_

Her fingers slipped over his hard shoulders as she settled herself more comfortably in his lap making Sean groan as the bottom of her thigh brushed against the aching stiffness that she had created.

Ignoring him, she raked her fingernails slowly down his chest as roughly as she could, pulling down his white wife beater a little as she did. But instead of hearing the yelp of pain that she expected, he groaned again. It made her lift her eyes to his in surprise.

"That was supposed to hurt," she said with a laugh. "You weren't supposed to enjoy it."

Seans shoulders lifted in a shrug as he gazed into her eyes heatedly. He tried to say something, but it came out muffled against his gag.

When she raked her fingers down his chest again, she watched his reaction as his eyes rolled into the back of his head, and he groaned again. She felt him swell against her thigh as a shudder tore through him. She was even wearing his favorite dress on her, the yellow little sundress that was strapless and tight around her curves.

Lifting his shirt up high, Emma stared in stunned amazement at the angry red claw marks she had left in her wake, and without really thinking about it, leaned forward to press her lips to one to soothe the injury she had caused.

Her action made a soft breath expel from Sean's throat before he whimpered again. The power she had over him with such a simple touch made Emma feel heady. Pressing her lips to another one she let her tongue come out to trace the angry red line she had created in his skin.

She could feel him pulling at his bonds in an attempt to be freed, and she knew in that moment it was because he wanted to touch her. A small smile tilted her lips when he growled in frustration.

Lifting her head, she looked into his intense blue eyes. "What's the matter, Sean?"

She could see the torture expressed in his eyes, and she had to grip his shoulders quickly to avoid being thrown from his lap when he lifted his hips roughly against her. Another growl escaped him as he made his point clear and lowered his head to kiss her, even with that towel in his mouth, but she wouldn't let him.

Emma's smile grew as she looked at him. "You want to fuck me, don't you?"

Nodding emphatically, he pleaded with her using his eyes. Lifting his hips again, he rubbed himself against her as a harsh breath escaped him.

A cruel idea began to formulate in Emma's mind making her reach up to run her fingers through his light brown hair. Gripping it lightly in her hand, she leaned forward until her lips were pressed against his ear.

"I want you to touch me, Sean. I need you right now. I need you inside of me. You belong inside me.."

Her softly uttered words made him tense up as another loud groan escaped him. Leaning into her, he hung his forehead against hers, eyes closing shut painfully and panting. When he pulled back, he sighed happily as her fingers wrapped back around his stiffened length.  
>"Tell me what you want.." she said softly.<p>

Tilting his head, he looked at her incredulously, but then his eyes crinkled, and a strange sound escaped him that sounded suspiciously like laughter.

When she continued to look at him expectantly, he sighed in aggravation, and began speaking into his gag. It came out garbled as he formed full sentences, and when he finished, his eyes crinkled again as he fought not to laugh and she too even giggled a bit.

She began lightly stroking him between her fingers while lifting her hand up and down his shaft. After a moment she paused, making him lift his head to look at her, but it was only so that she could reach down to lift her dress so that she could pull it up her body, and over her head.

When she dropped it to the floor beside the chair, Sean's eyes greedily feasted on her naked body as she began to stroke him once more. Her supple, round breasts showed off, and Sean's eyes clung to them as her thumb traced circles over the top of his engorged cock head until stopping and she lifted up a bit, only to position him between her legs but she wouldn't let him in and he cursed out loud in a muffle as he groaned again in agony. She was killing him. Sinking down slowly, she impaled herself on his shaft, and took the entire length inside of her as she lowered herself back down to his thighs.

The feel of her hot, and wet clutching around him, made Sean's eyes close tightly. When she wrapped her arms around his neck, and finally began moving against him he sighed in relief and bliss.

She rode him just the way he loved. Slow and hard, grinding into him on every downward stroke. It wasn't long before he felt himself getting ready to burst. 

He was able to last a few minutes, but Emma knew his body well, and when he began to swell slightly inside of her she quickly stilled, making him bellow at her through his gag.

He pulled at his bonds so violently when she stopped moving that Emma feared he would break the chair, and actually gain his freedom. . Her fingers dug into his shoulders, and she gazed into his murderous eyes as she started lifting up and down again. He closed his in agony as she continued to torture him, her soft little breaths and moans of pleasure driving him insane. She wasn't Sean's first like he was hers, but she fucked a lot better than any girls and like she had said before, it was like he BELONGED inside of her.

"Open your eyes, Sean. Look at me."

When he quickly obeyed, Emma gasped at the vulnerability she saw in them, and a tremor shot through her as she began to shake. She cried out a little and then grabbed the towel cloth in his mouth, and threw it away from them so that she could press her mouth to his.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she moaned when he crashed his mouth to hers, kissing her hungerily as if another second would of killed him if he didn't. His tongue came out to push roughly against her own.

She increased the speed of her hips against his, driving against him savagely. When her lips broke from his on a gasp, she tilted her head back as she moved, and Sean lowered his lips to press against her neck as she fucked him mercilessly.

"God, I fucking love you!" he panted and had tears at the corner of his eyes. "I love you, baby. Don't leave me. Please don't leave me," he begged her

Emma let out a cry of ecstasy as she began to fall apart on top of him. Pressing down hard, she pushed him as deep as he could go before her body exploded into a thousand pieces.

Sobbing out his name, she gripped his neck in a vice as she buried her face against him. When she finally stopped shuddering, she pulled back to look into his face in a daze.

"You didn't get to finish," she said softly. He was still thick, and hard inside of her.

His teeth gritted as he shook his head. "I don't give a fuck about that right now. I'm more worried that you're going to walk out that door now, and I'm never going to see you again."

Slipping from his lap, Emma stooped to pick up her fallen dress. "That's because I am, Sean." Pulling it over her head, she let it fall back into place before turning to look at him warily. "I don't want you to look for me. I'll never have any peace if I think that you're looking for me. I'm not staying around Degrassi."

"Don't do this," he said softly. "I can change. I don't want to hurt you anymore. I won't hurt you anymore. Don't leave me," he pleaded. "The drinking, it'll stop. I'll STOP!"

Emma's eyes were pained as she looked into his tortured blue eyes. "I can't take that chance, Sean. I have more to think of than myself now."

Gazing at her in confusion, he shook his head until her hand unconsciously reached down to cover her stomach. When he caught the slight motion, his eyes widened drastically as his eyes shot up to hers.

His voice became erratic, and panicked as he struggled against the chair. "Emma, untie me. You can't go. I can't let you go. Please untie me."

Her eyes were sad as she looked at him. "It will be better this way.. You can't be what we need. You're not the Sean I knew before all the drinking, and being in prison..it changed you, I know that now. I blame myself." she tried to hold back the tears.

His voice broke as he struggled harder. "I need you! Please, baby! Don't fucking do this to me!" tears began to run down his cheeks.

What had he done? If he could, he'd pour out ALL the bottles of booze in the house and in his to make her happy. He'd never touch the thing again. He'd even run and beg Peter down on his knees to forgive him if that's what Emma wanted. Hell, he'd do anything. His heart began to pound and rip and it was the most painful thing he'd ever felt...

Emma quietly slipped from the room after grabbing a small duffle bag, and Sean let out a bellow of pain as the ropes dug into his skin. He could feel blood trickling down his fingers as he pulled viciously against them.

She was gone.

**REVIEWS IF YOU WANT MORE?! Do you want them to end up together? DO you think Sean can redeem himself? Give me some ideas and motivation to go on! **


	2. I Need To Find Her

Sean rubbed both of his eyes with the palms of his hands before dropping them to the steering wheel. It felt like he hadn't slept in weeks.

It's been two years since what had happened with him and Emma. When the love of his life walked out on him, rightfully. One year, letting her go and trying to better himself, and then another year trying to find her... she was good, she wasn't in the computer, in the phone books..nothing.

Two years. That meant his baby was born after 9 months, and was a year and 3 months old..give or take. He never found out how far along she was when she left. He couldn't believe it, him and Emma had a kid together...he use to dream of this. He didn't dream of being the abusive son of a bitch prison and drinking turned him into though. He knew Emma had full right not to take him back, but he at least wanted to SHOW her he changed...he owed her that much. She was the reason he went to AA, why he stopped going out with the guys..she was also the reason he couldn't move on but that was different. He couldn't even look at other girls who swung themselves over him knowing he was now single.

..he couldn't do it though. He tried once, and he ended up kicking a shirtless girl out. She was no Emma. **Nobody **could be near perfect as Emma

He had been driving for the better part of three days following yet another lead, and for the hundredth time he silently prayed that this one would end in him finding her. He had begged Manny, like literally on his hands and knees. She had started dating Jay and she HATED him for what seemed forever but she was slowly starting to take pity on him, or at least his unknown child that it didn't know it's father. So she told him the city...not the address, but the city was good enough.

**Welcome to Saint Catherines.** Sean passed the city sign and his heart pounded.

Running a hand through his light brown hair, he closed his eyes as the familiar ache tore through his frame. He couldn't go on like this much longer. If he didn't find her soon he didn't know what he was going to do to himself. He was filled with guilt since sobering up, knowing what he did and what he lost.

His mind drifted to the obvious solution. It seemed like his thoughts strayed there more and more often of late. He could just end it. A bottle of sleeping pills would put him out of his misery quickly. He could just go to sleep, and never wake up. There would be no more pain if he went to sleep forever. Or, do the quick thing like Rick had, gun to the head.

He regretted every horrible thing he had ever done. Every horrific thing he had ever said. The absence of liquor for the past 2 years had brought every memory back to him with extreme clarity, and the shame that filled him practically consumed him. he was suppose to **protect **her and he didn't, he was the reason she needed protecting. He had been awful, jealous and angry all the time. He accused her of cheating all the time, and that she didn't love him anymore. He was a sad, pathetic man ... no, boy. Now he was a man, going to find his one true love and his baby to fix everything. To show them he was Sean again, that he'd never hurt them again..**ever.**

He couldn't blame the liquor alone. He knew that a good majority of what he had done had stemmed from a place of fear and self loathing. He had been so terrified of losing her. So sure that one day something would take her from him or she would sense up and notice she was too good, too beautiful for him. Yet, she really did belong with him. She fit in his arms perfectly, her smile made him melt, she was the only one who saw his funny side and laughed at his jokes, her lips were perfect against his.

She was completely right. He had been a monster. All he wanted to do was make it up to her.. even if that meant not being with her but at least a part of her life.

Getting out of the car, Sean closed the door then leaned his weight forward against it. Over his car hood was the house she supposedly was in. His forehead dropped to his arms as he placed them on top of the car. His voice was broken and strangled as his breath hitched in his chest. "Please, God. Please let her be here. Fucking help me."

Wiping the moisture away from his eyes, Sean made his way around the car and up the driveway. He wore something different today, nice blue jeans and a black button on shirt that was pulled up to his elbows. He ran a hand through his hand as he took the steps that led up to the small house,and once he stood before the front door he took a deep shakey breath.

The nervousness he felt made him tremble, but he quickly strengthened his resolve before lifting his hand to knock upon the thick wood of the door. His eyes lowered fearfully as he waited for someone to answer..

The woman who opened the door wasn't Emma, and his gut turned. He felt he was going to be sick. Gazing into Sean's intent blue eyes she seemed to be assessing him. She was a familiar looking woman, shortish.. blonde hair. Big wide eyes naturally. Who was this? When she finally responded, her voice was flat and direct.

"She isn't here."

Sean's eyes widened. So at least he found the right house. Hs response was immediate. "Where is she?"

Once again, the woman paused as her big eyes looked into his. "She doesn't want to be found," she finally responded. "The best thing you can do for her is to leave her alone."

Sean's eyes were pained as they lowered for a moment, but then he lifted them, and the desperation in them was evident. "Please," he breathed. "I have to find her. I have to at least say sorry..you don't know what I did."

"Oh I know, Sean." she was shocked too by her anger. She eyed him as he fought to avoid her eyes but tears were swelling up in his. She felt...bad. Biting her lip for a moment in indecision, she quickly strengthened her resolve. "I'm sorry. I can't help you."

Running a hand through his hair in agitation, Sean turned his head, and looked down the block momentarily as his thoughts ran askew. When he turned back he nodded with a resolve of his own. "I'm not leaving until you tell me where she is."

"What are you gonna do? Hit me too?" she taunted.

He paused, dropping his eyes and just turned away from her. Sean sat down on the top step of the porch. This was his plan, he wasn't going anyway. Sean Cameron didn't use violence anymore. Ever.

The woman seemed at a loss as she gazed at his back. She hadn't been expecting this.

"You have to leave," she said firmly. "If you stay there you're going to force me to call the police."

He didn't turn in order to respond. "Call them," Sean said stubbornly, "Maybe you can explain to them why it is that you're helping and abetting a kidnapper. I have a right to know where my child is."

His words gave her pause as she continued to gaze at his slumped figure. After a moment, she turned away from him, and closed the door with her unsteady breath. He was right. She couldn't hold him to that.

Caitlin walked to the phone, and dialed her bestfriends daughters number. "Emma?"... "He's here."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_**[love the way you lie- Rihanna:]**__**  
>Just gonna stand there and watch me burn<br>But that's alright because I like the way it hurts  
>Just gonna stand there and hear me cry<br>But that's alright because I love the way you lie  
>I love the way you lie<br>I love the way you lie**_


	3. Be The Man You Deserve

"He's sitting on my front porch. He said that he's not going to leave until I tell him where you are." Caitlin was on the phone again with Emma, only a few hours later. Sean STILL hadn't left.. he sat there, calmly on the porch.

A small laugh came through the receiver. "What did you say to that?"

The woman became agitated as she answered. "I told him that if he didn't get the hell out of here that I was going to call the police. I thought that would do the trick, but he encouraged me to do it. Said I was helping and abetting a kidnapper."

Another sigh was heard, and then silence.

"He seems pretty determined, Emma. What should I do?"

"I don't know. I need time to think. He's just sitting out there?" she asked, "It's really cold out..".

The woman nodded. "Like the Sunday morning newspaper. He looks...tired actually but other than that, really upset.."

Emma admitted, "I can't believe he held on for two years..." Another moment passed before Emma finally responded. "Can you give me a little bit of time to decide what to do? Just like ten minutes, and then call me back."

"Sure. If he comes to the door again, I'll just ignore it."

"Thanks, Caitlin. You've been a lot of help since I was a knocked up teen to a young mother..." she laughed sadly.

"Anytime. Just one last thing though."

Emma answered quickly. "What is it?"

"That guy is unbelievably gorgeous, Emma. I can see how Bailey ended up being so dang cute! It's hard to admit but if he wants you to take him back, he may be irresistible.."

She could hear the smile in her Emma's voice as she responded. "That's why I have to hide. I'm just still weak to Sean in other ways.. Sure I'm stronger, better, and I'm sure he's changed, Manny keeps insisting he did..but I'm not ready. I can't even decide if I want him to see Bailey.."

"Well.." Cailtin hated to say it, "You said he was a great guy before the booze right? Snake said he'd been going to AA meetings... Snake also always said the kid had a rough life.. he had to take a few steps back before he took a few steps forward and yes that's no excuse for hitting you but you have to remember he was another person, not himself and you two were younger. It's been over two years... He seems pretty upset out there Emma, but calm..you know? Stable. Also think of Bailey...It's hard without both your parents.." Caitlin drifted off knowingly, "And you know that too."

Shane. Shane was a parent Emma didn't get to know. It use to eat her up inside.

((((((((((((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Sean ran his hand through his hair for what seemed like the hundredth time before his gaze darted towards the sky. Was there even anyone up there listening to him? Probably not. His ass was probably going to hell for all the shit he pulled as a teenager. He hadn't seen Emma since he was 17, she 16. Which meant now he was 19, she 18..

The excruciating weight pressing down onto his chest increased, and for a moment he had to grit his teeth to keep from falling apart. Taking a few deep breaths, he managed to bring himself back under control. He deserved this pain. He had earned it. Every single thing he had done had led him to where he was, and this was his true punishment. Nothing she had done to him before leaving could compare to what he was experiencing right now. **This time** he was sober, he was **him, **couldn't hide behind the booze, or any more anger. He had to look into her eyes himself and know everything he did to her, what he did to the girl he loved since he was 13 years old. 

He jumped a little when the front door open, and Caitlin stepped out with her coat and car keys. She went by him, taunting him a little, "Maybe you should give up."

Sean sniffed a little and watched her walk away into the night before looking down at his shakey hands. He could go get warm in his car, wait for her there...but no. He wasn't going to 'give up' . Never.

Even if that meant sleeping on a porch tonight.

Sean woke up with a pain in his neck, a little in his back too. He opened his eyes to the grey morning and would of chuckled if not so tired. Well. That was a horrible sleep on the porch stairs, against the brick wall. He yawned and fluttered his eyes open. It was like autumn, and he could see his breath but then noticed something around his shoulders.

It must of been 6am or something, the sun still hid but it was light out. He had a blanket over his shoulders now so Caitlin must of came back without him waking up. (He had been driving for three days straight).

"You're starting to scare our neighbors." came a voice he knew too well behind him, inside the house. He couldn't even turn.

It was **Emma.**

His gut turned, butterflies quivered, his heart twisted, his brain felt fried and he didn't even know if he could turn. This was the girl he's been in love with his whole life, the girl he had hurt beyond possibly repair.

He turned to look over his shoulder and she too straightened up a little, but had a sleeping baby girl on her shoulder. Sean's eye's grew wide, knowing this was his daughter. Emma looked beautiful as always too, but like a real young woman. Her hair was longer, blonder, and she was so grown up.

She too noticed he looked more like a man, and it raced her heart, as much as she tried to make it stop. The way his eyes tore into hers right now, she wanted to swear it was the eyes that fooled you but she knew it wasn't, the real Sean Cameron was looking back at her, ashamed and guilt consumed.

She nodded merely happy with that, and she turned her head to kiss the top of Baileys head before she muttered to Sean. "Come on."

Sean raised up slowly, but couldn't move forward. He was scared, feet felt glued to the porch steps. What if next, he hurt the baby ? His baby. What if he-

"Sean." she said once more, noticing him not following. It was cold out there, and leaving the door open was making the house cold too.

Sean swallowed the lump in his throat when she said his name, she always said it sweeter than anybody else did. He finally moved forward in a trance and followed her.

Stepping from the living room, Emma led Sean to their daughters bedroom, and approached the wooden crib.. Lowering Bailey into it gently, Sean couldn't tear his eyes off of them, Bailey was so damn beautiful and tiny and Emma never looked more strong and collected. Emma was where Bailey was getting all her beauty from, she had the blonde hair, the perfect everything..but she did have blue eyes like Sean's, unknowingly to him, and the milky white skin. Emma lifted her tiny blanket to cover her up as her small head turned, and she closed her eyes before Emma turned back to Sean and just crossed her arms and shrugged. "So what did you want?"

Sean snapped out of his trance and gave her a look like she was crazy if she didn't know, "I wanna know her, Emma."

"What?" EMma snickered and walked out of the bedroom. Sean glanced once more longingly at Bailey before following his ex, "You going to use the kidnap card on me too like Caitlin?" she snickered, back out in the living room.

Sean clenched his jaw. He would of never, he just had to make Caitlin let him stay to see Emma. Emma could as easily put out the 'abusive' card next..

"I wouldn't... but I need you to _let me _see her, **know her. **_PleaseEm."_

"Don't call me that." she said snippily.

He looked down sadly and his eyes squinted as hurt struck him. He had really ruined them, their relationship, her. No, no she was more than fine now, better than ever, stronger and independent. Thankfully, he didn't ruin her.

Emma's thoughts ran rampant for a full thirty seconds before she took a deep breath. Everything was going to be alright. The real Sean was back, and he looked tortured. Good. She didn't feel bad about that. The whites of his eyes were etched with streaks of red, and the bright blue that she so distinctly remembered had faded to a dull color that she barely recognized. Her eyes then glanced down at the ground when she admitted to herself it was good seeing him like that, so empty, but didn't want him to suffer anymore. She knew Sean deep down, it wasn't completely him that did this to them, wasn't all his fault. They were young, stupid, wreck less and with Bailey as proof, careless.. But not anymore, things were different , they were different and now could be adults.

"I really didn't think you'd try to track me down two years later..."

Sean was pressing his lips together tightly, he frowned for a moment, and then his expression crumbled as he took a step forward.

He didn't lift his hands to touch her. He kept them at his sides, and Emma watched him rather closely but once he was standing in front of her, he lowered his head until his face was buried against her neck, and let out a sob.

Emma eyes widened in surprise. Of all the things she had expected, this had definitely not been it.

When she lifted her hand to place it hesitantly on the back of his head, his shaking increased. A cry of agony was ripped from his throat, and then his tears fell freely. He had held them in so long, it was as if a damn was bursting inside of him.

"I'm. Sorry. I'm. **So.** Sorry."

When she lifted her other hand to his back, he finally raised his arms to crush her to him. Another sob escaped him as he squeezed her to him tightly. "I was wrong. Everything I did was wrong. I-I wasn't me, Emma. Please know that. I'll do whatever you want. I'll be whatever you want. I just need you."

He was beyond desperation as he made the plea. His entire being felt painfully tight as he held her. When she pulled back, he had to fight to keep from latching onto her. He wasn't ready to let go.. he hadn't for two years. Hell, he hadn't since he met her. Even when he use to date Ellie Nash he watched Emma from a far. When he was with Amy, the rebound, he hoped it made Emma jealous. He couldn't let her go. She was his life.

He was too ashamed to look at her, and kept his eyes on the floor as her gaze roamed over his face. When she took his hand, he finally looked up in surprise.

"Come on," she told him softly.

As she walked back into the room, she whispered, "I need you to be quiet. I don't want her to wake up, she doesn't know you yet so seeing a stranger when she wakes up will just scare her. Can you do that?"

Nodding numbly, Sean watched as she pushed the door open slowly, and led him inside. She leaned on the crib, watching Bailey sleep and it took three long waited steps for Sean to come up behind Emma, peering over her shoulder and his eyes fell on his baby girl. He missed out on a year of raising her, but it was deserved. He'd make up for it, for every lost second and minute.

Without a moments hesitation, he had to wrap his arms around Emma from behind. She sucked in a shakey breath, but didn't tell him to stop. She bit her lip though, feeling his also shakey breath on the back of her neck

"I love you so much," he breathed into her hair as he squeezed her.

After a moment, Emma opened her eyes from the warmth and protective hold and turned. When he thought she was going to rip away from him, her big brown eyes stared up at him and just took his hand. He was confused as she led them out, and to the next room. "I didn't sleep all night and I doubt you slept well on the porch." Emma teased him

He tried not to look tense, but when Emma crawled into her bed and allowed him to take the other side, he couldn't move or breath. Emma even had to tease him as she noticed, "We're just _sleeping _, Sean." it was like a warning too, that he better not try anything.

He was tired. Awfully fucking tired, but even when he slept he never got a good night rest but he was sure with Emma by his side again he would. He slowly got in, and she curled into her covers a bit more. He watched her close her eyes, and it didn't take her long to fall asleep beside him either. He had thought maybe it'd be hard for her to sleep next to him, but she slept as soundingly as he did when he finally shut his eyes too.

When he awoke, it was to the sound of a soft cry of displeasure. Opening his eyes, Sean panicked momentarily when he saw that Emma was not beside him, but he ran out of the room, he saw her standing beside the crib. His chest sagged in relief as his head dropped back to breath and noticed the sun was up now, shining bright. He felt wide awake too, happier than ever, feeling good. Emma had turned from the crib and Bailey lied awake in her arms, staring back at Sean as Emma came over and his heart pounded out of his chest and he even took one step back.

He didn't want to hurt anyone.

"You won't hurt her, Sean." Emma always knew what he was thinking, and knew he'd never harm their daughter. She was sure he'd be the type of Dad to make his daughter a daddys girl. A suck up.

"Do you want to meet your daddy, Bailey?" she asked softly.

His heart thumped within his chest as he pulled himself together to hold the baby.

Lifting the baby towards him, she pressed the bundle into his arms before he could protest any further. Once she was cradled in the crook of his arm, he looked down into her soft blue eyes, and felt completely didn't even cry, she looked up at him in as much amazement as he did down to her. She was so tiny and adorable.

"She's beautiful," he breathed in amazement.

Emma's smile widened as she looked at him. "Well she does look more like me," she joked but then admitted, "She has your eyes," she informed him.

Sean couldn't tear his gaze away from the tiny face before him. "She looks like you," he said in awe.

Emma nodded a bit happily to that and whiped away a tear that fell, watching them together. She joked again, "Shes stubborn like you though. Doesn't like her naps."

"Well then that has to be like you cause I love my sleep." he said with a smirk, flashing Emma look.

Emma's heart skipped. Caitlin was right , it was hard to resist him and that damn smirk.

"You're a father now, Sean. If you want to be a part of her life, a part of our life, nothing can be like it was before."

Sean's eyes widened as his daughter lifted a tiny hand towards his face."It won't be," he swore.

Lifting his head he looked into Emma's eyes with determination. "I've been in AA for 2 years. Its got an anger managment course too. I-I almost own Tonys auto now and I WON'T screw this up. I've spent the better part of this year hating myself thinking about all the things I have done.. I'd **never **hurt you again." he stepped closer, Bailey between them who stayed awfully quiet for a baby.

His eyes closed for a moment as he stood an inch away from Emma's face now, almost resting his forehead on hers the way he use to, "I want to be the man you deserve. The man you both deserve."

Emma gazed into his sincere blue eyes before shifting to her daughter. "I hope so, Sean..but it's more about being the man she deserves."

He nodded but the love for Emma shined through his eyes as he looked desperetly at her. He wanted HER too. He knew it was greedy but he was aching for her, just to even kiss her.

Emma sucked in abreath, staring at his lips and felt his eyes on hers and he went to lean closer to kiss her. "I'm with someone, Sean."

Like a knife to the heart. Sean even cringed in pain but pulled away slowly, holding Bailey closer to him and looked at Emma numbly but looked away and nodded. His eyes looked torn.

She looked away with confusion written over her own face. She didn't know why she said that. She wasn't even serious about the guy, the guy was no Sean. Sean owned her heart and hell, owned her soul too. She just...didn't know if she was ready for that yet

Still though, she was beyond shocked that Sean just nodded, trying to stay calm and focused back on Bailey. Emma was expecting a fight, jealousy... instead she got a calm yet disappointed nod.

Sean closed his eyes again as he had to say this though,. "I love you. Just know that. I'll always be in love with you. I love both of you. I'm never going to mess this up again.. even if you just wanna be friends."

With a returned smile from Emma, she let her daughter and Sean be alone for a bit as she cooked dinner. They had slept almost all day.

As Sean sat there on the living room floor with Bailey, playing blocks with her and watching her favorite movie, he watched Emma at the corner of his eye in the kitchen. He'd get her back, he would. He'd make it up, he'd be better for her more than this 'other guy' ever could be.

They'd move back to Degrassi with him, and they'd be a real family.

In the kitchen, Emma leaned forward on the sink with her breath unsteady, her heart skipping beats and pounding. Resisting Sean Cameron was **very hard **to do, especially when he even confirmed he'd always be in love with her.

..she had the same problem.


	4. I Love You

"When is Adam coming to get you?" Caitlin asked, coming into the kitchen and smiled to Emma who made her coffee and passed a mug into her hands.

Emma held her own coffee, and put both her warm hands around her mug as she leaned on the sink with a deep sigh, "Soon."

Caitlin saw how distant Emma's hazel eyes were, and just _who _they were gazing at. Caitlin couldn't help but to check him out either. Sean was fixing the lock on Caitlins door that she and Emma were having trouble with lately, and not only did he not really need to do it, he still insisted he should even though this was a nice neighborhood and nobody in their right mind would come into this house where Sean Cameron was living for the past two weeks. He looked damn fine hammering the nails into the door and all that manly stuff.

"Try not to drool when your new boyfriend comes by."

"He's not my boyfriend." Snapped Emma in a whisper to then shut her eyes and correct herself, "and I'm not drooling over anything right now."

Caitlin just giggled and went to Bailey who sat in her highchair. Sean had been here, staying in the guest room, and being a total gentleman. He always got up and tended every minute to Bailey in the middle of the night when she woke up crying. Bailey was already attached to him and that stressed Emma out. She didn't know what Bailey would think when Sean finally went back home and wasn't here every morning.

Her heart ripped up into pieces just thinking about it.

Emma stood straight up and turned her head away from Sean's direction when he came back over carrying his hammer and nodded to the door over his shoulder, "New lock is on the door, and you got a chain now too."

"How handy of you." taunted Caitlin, smirking and sharing a giggle with Bailey who didn't really know what it was about but everyone was smiling and that made her happy!

Sean chuckled and went to the fridge, "Do you mind if I take a water?"

"There's beer in the bottom." Caitlin said and then cringed. Woops. Even Sean paused and just coughed slightly, glancing at Emma.

Emma awkwardly sipped her coffee and Sean just went for the water bottle and cracked it open. That's when the door rang.

Emma's eyes widened. Adam! Adam in the same place as Sean. Ohgod,ohgod,ohgod!

"I'll get it!"

Both Caitlin and Sean blinked as they watched Emma flee to the door. Adam was lean, tall but not buff. He had black hair and looked around their age but had a country-ish style to him. Plaid red shirt and jeans.

"Hey there." he grinned, coming in as Emma tried to block the door but he came on in anyways! Awkward...

In the kitchen, Caitlin caught Sean trying not to look but he itched the back of his head and snuck a glance over.

Emma looked good, too good; aka way too good for this guy. Who the hell was this guy anyways? Did he think-

Sean swallowed and looked away. He couldn't be jealous, jealous led to anger..but damn, he wasn't ready to see Emma with another guy even if she did to him the silent favor of keeping Adam away for two weeks so Sean had time with his daughter and a little time with Emma too. Of course, Emma kept her distance...but Sean took anything he could.

"You look great.." sighed Adam, gazing down at Emma in heaven as she wore a little white summer dress and her hair was naturally straight.

She blushed, but not for the comment, she swore she could hear Sean's growl from in the kitchen. "Do you wanna go now?"

"Well, I was wondering if I could see Bailey." Adam said with a wide smile.

Now over in the kitchen, Caitlin couldn't even disagree with Sean's anger as he crossed his arms and clenched his jaw. Emma couldn't even stop Adam from going around her and to the kitchen, she fearfully looked around and followed him.

"Hello Bai-" Adam stopped in his tracks, Emma right behind him with a look upon her face that basically read 'crap'. He noticed Sean first, how couldn't he? The guy looked like hard competetion... and Bailey seemed to be staring at him in awe and completely ignoring Adam's presense. "Hi." he greeted, glancing at Caitlin who he knew but eyed down the stranger.

"You know Caitlin," introduced Emma, pointing to her who he had met once and then she pointed a little towards Sean, "And this is..this is Se-"

"Sean." he simply introduced himself, coming over and putting his hand out.

Not only did Adam inspect his hand, but Emma did to. What was Sean up to? Playing all nice? Adam shook it though, wondering if maybe this guy was Emma's family. Little did he know Sean was her daughters father.

"Adam. Emma's boyfriend."

Emma rolled her eyes. Adam HAD to say that?

"Nice to meet you," he had to smirk as he joked, "I'm the **ex **boyfriend." Sean caught Emma's glare and annoyed look. WHY did he have to say that?! He kept his eye on her and just smirked more. She tried to ignore the butterflies going crazy in her stomach, reminding her how much that smirk played with her head.

"Ex? Why you around here then?" Adam laughed but it came out so forced and uncomfortably. He then glanced at Bailey, and back at Sean. No...this couldn't be.. the father?

"Trying to win her back." Sean said matter of factly and stood so calm, his face unreadable.

Adam had to laugh, insisting that had to be a joke and just so he'd feel better, the ladies joined in too and Emma yanked on Adams hand to go as she shot Sean a furious glare now, "He's joking, lets go." she insisted to Adam.

Adam waved his hand, "Bye guys!" he turned, and followed Emma out.

Sean squinted his arms and crossed his arms watching them go. Behind him, Bailey let out a long sigh. "Yea. I don't like him either Bee."

Caitlin smirked at his nickname for Bailey and looked between the two when Sean came back to sit with them. "Impressive." she taunted, "Not one punch swung..." she had to ask with a sly grin, "How hard were you trying to pull back?"

Sean looked exhausted as he admitted, "A lot."

"he's harmless." Caitlin insisted, "Emma's with him because he's no drama, from Texas actually. He's.. safe, goes slow."

"Are they serious?"

Caitlin bit the end of her tounge trying not to pity Sean as she saw the pain cross his face.

"Yea." she lied. Sean nodded stiffly and looked down.

(((((((*******))))))))

"And how about the Habs game?!" Adam asked during dinner.

Emma sat there so boredly. He went on and on about Hockey or his stupid job.. it was boring! Months of boredom with this guy.

She wondered what everyone was up to at the house...what Sean and Bailey were doing. She smiled softly as she remembered Sean had just taught Bailey the peek a boo, she was obsessed with it now! Sean was such a softy now too.. it was a little pathetic but adorable to see and just what she needed to see of him.

"Did you see it?"

"No." Emma said, snapping out of it but knew what Adam was STILL talking about. "I don't watch hockey." she raised an eyebrow so he got the point.

He just went on, "Aw! You missed the BEST penalty ever then, Domi went-"

As he spoke, Emma went over the last two weeks with Sean as she ignored Adam.. Sure she kept her space, she let Sean have his time with Bailey and at night when Bailey was put to bed maybe some nights she'd watch a movie with Sean. She shouldn't of felt disappointed but she did, he hadn't even made one move on her. Tonight was a little let down too, she felt no jealousy off of Sean.. only that little 'trying to win her back' comment, but was he joking?

How come Sean could tell Emma two weeks ago he'd always love her, yet Emma always second guessed it after? . . .Maybe she was just use to him telling her he loved her every night. But..it wasn't like that anymore right?

She tried to focus on Adam, but she couldn't do it. As he sat at their table in the restaurant that was set up with candles and suppose to be romantic, all Emma could do was wish he was Sean. Sean had once took her out for dinner too with candles all around, the time he came back from Degrassi and got the Dot to stay open later just for them. He could be a softy for her too sometimes.

"Anything else?" the waiter asked as he came back over and carried a bottle of wine, "Would you like to try our new red wine?"

Emma stared at it and tilted her head. It's said that an alcoholic who hadn't drank in a year had 60% chance of hitting rock bottom and going back to it. 35% for people who hadn't drank in a year and half, and 10% of people who hadn't drank in two years. . .ya, Emma did her research. How could she not? But how could Sean go back to it after two whole years knowing what he could get back? Emma just doubted he would be part of the 10% that went back to drinking.. she just knew in her heart.

Her poor, poor heart. It was screaming for Sean. She was trying so hard to resist it but it was right, her Sean was back, and he waiting at home patiently for her. He was there, and she was here, wasting her time on boring Adam. Where was the thrill? Excitement? Passion?

"I-I gotta go."

"Emma!" Adam exclaimed, eyes widening to how fast she got up and ran out. The waiter even cringed a bit for her.

"Wow man, you got ditched."

Adam glared at the waiter.

(((((((((******))))))

As Emma ran back home, her feet were so sore from running in heels. She didn't know why she didn't just call a cab, but she needed the air just to have a breather and make sure she wasn't losing it. But no, no she knew what she wanted.

Who she wanted.

She was still hopelessly in love with him.

Her phone suddenly rang and she paused, stopping on the side walk as she went into her purse but pouted. She was three more houses away. She answered it though when she noticed who it was and smiled a little. "Hello?"

"Hey.." came Sean's reply.

Emma tilted her head. As she stood on the sidewalk, in the dark with stars above her, she saw Sean come out from the house slowly on his phone...talking to _her _and he didn't even notice she was right over here.

Emma raised an eyebrow, seeing him looking choked up and only heard his slight unsteady breath on the other end. Just incase, she hid slowly behind a tree but kept her eyes on him as she answered back, "You still there?"

She watched him sit down on the porch and he did what Sean Cameron always did, those thick shaped eyebrows of his furrowed as he concentrated hard on the ground, trying to figure out what he was going to say.

"I just.. had a question." he paused, "I know you're on your date.. but it's about Bailey."

"Mhm?" Emma asked.

Sean sat there and looked up from the ground to look up at the stars. Emma fell into a trance while staring at him. He looked...so perfect. Her charming man.

"Actually," he said, "Nevermind. She's fine now."

Emma bit her lip while smiling. Sean was lying. Bailey wasn't in site, there was nothing wrong. Had he just wanted to talk to her?

He said stiffly, "how's your date?"

Emma shut her eyes from giggling out loud before she opened them and slowly started to go over to Sean, "Good. Until you ruined it."

Sean's eyes widened and he looked away from the moon and back to the ground with a tortured look. He was still oblivious to her being there, "I-I'm sorry, Emma. Fuck, I shouldn't of called. I just..." he was speechless. He put his head down in his hands, letting the phone off of his ear for a moment before he coughed and tried to man up. He put it back to his ear and spoke again but softly, "I just wanted to talk to you..."

Emma had to whisper now, standing at the corner of her house, peeking around it to see him still sitting on the porch. "About what?" she leaned back on the brick wall, her knees going weak. She felt like she was falling in love with him all over again.

"Nothing." Sean admitted weakily, "Just...needed to hear your voice." he shut his eyes painfully, "I miss you, Em."

She closed her eyes as she leaned her head back on the wall too.

"I'll let you go back on your date. I just...wanted...I wanted to say I love you."

Emma got choked up, his words hitting her heart like a hammer. It took a real man to let someone they loved go, and not only that but to accept her with another guy.. even if he was still in love with her. Emma put herself in his position and didn't think she'd be so kind to another woman who had her hands all over Sean. Sean was hers, and she was hopelessly his.

"Emma?.."

Sean sat on the porch, and he squinted his eyes as he tried to hear any trace of Emma on the other end. "Who am I kidding?" he snickered bitterly, taking his phone off his ear and hearing a dial tone. He hung up and set it down beside him and seemed to be trying to count to 10 before he took a deep breath and shook his head at himself, "I shouldn't of called." he said out loud to himself, "She deserves to be with..." he mocked Adam, "_Prince Charming.._ " he even snarled a little.

"I do deserve that." her voice made him jump, he stood up and turned around to Emma who had taken the back door of her house to get in and now leaned on the open front door, smirking back at him. "Sadly though," she looked up as if annoyed, "**My **Prince Charming is a guy who talks to himself, calls his ex while she's on dates with other guys, and acts like an immature child when he's jealous."

Sean cringed embarrassingly but it didn't stop him from smiling and Emma admired that smile she missed oh so much. She couldn't help but giggle back and look inside, "Everyone asleep?"

He nodded, his eyes on her in a bit of confusion but curiosity. Did she just call him her Prince charming then? Was that a good thing? It had to be a good thing..Right?

She put her index finger on her lips, signaling him to be quiet and she turned back to walk back into the house. The lights were off, but Sean followed her easily by the moon light shining through the windows. He closed the door behind him when he noticed Emma leaning on her bedroom door. His heart started to thump as she kept her eyes right back on him as she opened her bedroom door. His feet were glued to the floor, not knowing what to do.

Was this a test? A mean, teasing test?

Emma raised an eyebrow at him. Was he resisting or that much of an idiot? She tried not to giggle at she bit her lip again and laughed in silence. To make this more easy for Sean to understand, she unzipped her dress and let it drop to her feet.

Seans mouth hung, his tongue as dry as a sponge in the desert. His pants were suddenly tighter as his eyes were scanning hungrily at Emma's body in a white creamy lace bra and matching thong. Her tanned, hour glass body leaned against her bedroom door and the moon light was hitting her so perfectly. Her long blonde hair swayed softly around her shoulders and she tucked one piece behind her ear.

He stood there, in jeans and white shirt, and Emma came back over to him. He stood in the middle of the room, speechless and dumbfounded. He groaned when she now stood infront of him, cupping his face and her near naked body almost up against his. "Emma."

She took his hands, and they felt shakey. Her heart skipped, and she brought his hands to her waist and when he finally felt her warm toned skin, he gripped them and pulled her into him. She gasped, but smiled as his look- no- her Look. The look he only gave her. That look of hunger, thrill and passion. Want.

"You won't regret this." promised Sean, leaning his forehead down on Emma's and his heart cried out happily.

Emma moaned a little, feeling his hands work down her hips to her ass a little, his finger tips teasing her and gripping her cheeks. Her hands carressed through his hair and she crashed her mouth up to his, and he passionately kissed her back. His eyes closed so hard, hoping this wasn't a dream but if it was he NEVER wanted to wake up. Her tounge danced with his and her hands left the back of his head to rip at his shirt and peel it off him. The moment they parted to get the shirt off was agony, but she moaned when they kissed again and he lifted her easily up into his arms, carrying her to her room.

She whimpered, kissing him heavily on the bed and his fingers now teasing her. He rubbed her, but only on top of her panties. "In." she whimpered once more.

"Hmm?" he teased in her ear, nibbling it playfully.

"Sean, don't." she begged, breathless and arching her hips into his hand, "Been too long..". Her nails dug into his biceps since holding onto his arms in desperate need. She felt his hand rub between her panties harder and she moaned loudly, shutting her eyes.

He kissed her neck gently, once for each month he'd been away from her.

He kissed her shoulder for all the times he use to make her cry.

He kissed along her collarbone for a way to thank her for not giving up on him and sucked on that for a moment, making her moan and sigh, her hands clenching around the bed sheets.

She gasped into his ear like she understood what he was doing but he continued anyways, continuing his slow, apologetic rhythm. She shuddered under him and then pouted when she felt him stop and take his hands off her and he looked to be getting off of her. She felt so empty when his body left hers.

"What's wrong?" fear almost went to her eyes.

"Nothing," Sean answered, climbing back after his jeans were off and laid back between her legs. He noticed she didn't open them as wide as she usually would for him back two years ago..but ofcourse they'd have to start all over again. They were different, yet still the same.. She almost looked innocent all over again, as if her first time with him once again. He looked down at her with a firm look in his eyes, "I won't hurt you ever again, Emma." he promised, lifting her chin with his fingers to make her look at him. "**Ever."**

Her eyes locked on his, and he felt her legs open more for him and he positioned himself between her thighs. He slowly slid into Emma and they both shut their eyes in bliss and Sean groaned, forgetting how warm and tight she felt around him. He kissed her as he shuddered also, and as he worked the rest of his cock into her she gasped, her lips opening wide between the kiss. She HADN'T forgot how big and good he was, he could still make her moan and feel so filled. "Sean."

Her moans were driving him mad. He pumped into her slowly, repeating 'I love you' with every thrust. He whispered to her how good she felt and how much he had missed her. "Tell me you love me," he whispered to her. It caught her by surprise and she didn't respond. "Tell me," he demanded again. He thrust into her harder and repeated it. "Tell me baby, tell me you love me." he hands roamed over her body, leaving goosebumps all over.

Emma knew saying I love you to him was going to push him over the edge and he would never let her go after that. Was she okay with that? Was she ready to take him back forever? Sean's hands moved up her own hands. He intertwined his fingers in hers and pushed her hands down into the bed above her head. She breathed his name in passion, and arched back. His cock plunged into her so deeply, and her body was spent from feeling him inside of her again. It was heaven.

"Tell me," he muttered to her, pumping away. He hoped the pleasure would get it out of her. If he fucked her good enough, she would say it to him. He breathed heavily, his climax getting closer but his heart sinking with every second that went by that she didn't tell him. He felt the tears swelling up in his eyes, without his consent and he shut his eyes tightly. "Tell me," he mumbled one last time. 

Emma felt the wetness on her shoulder and realized he was crying. It tore at her heart and made her feel horrible, ofcourse she loved him. She just felt scared to say it.. and not because she was afraid of him- she wasn't, not anymore. He wasn't that guy anymore.

His thrusting stopped but he stayed inside her, still hard but nuzzeling her neck, tears in his eyes and Emma felt a tear slid down the corner of hers. "I love you," She finally said, wrapping her arm around his neck, pulling him even closer to her. "I love you," She repeated, "I love you." she gasped as she lifted her own hips to take more of him inside her, out, and back in.

Sean's body froze and he looked at her face, he looked dumbfounded. He blinked at her and stared for a moment. "I love you," she repeated one more time before kissing him. She shoved her hips up into him and he began thrusting back into her again and it turned passionate.

Emma whimpered beneath him, her climax building and building until she went over the edge and cried out. She gripped him with her legs and squeezed as the pleasure raced through her body, sizzling her skin.

Sean kissed her hard, groaning into her mouth as he felt himself come. He slammed into her hard, feeling her tiny frame slide upward in the bed. He plunged into her again, softer this time as his climax shook through him. He dove as deep into her as he could, feeling the orgasm subside and he pulled away from the kiss when he finally came and shuddered. Emma's thighs spread wider, feeling him come into her hard.

"Are you.." she panted, and tried to ask something but she was in a haze. That was possibly one of their best make up sex they've ever had.

He collapsed on top, but was careful not to crush her. He was breathless too and tilted his head as he caressed her hair. Is he what?

"wearing.." she gave him a look and he was still being dumb, "A condom." she bluntly said, rolling her eyes but smiling and giggled to his 'oh' look but then noticed his cringe.

"fuck." he looked down and had slipped out of her. Emma moaned and bit her lip. He couldn't help but smirk back at her and then pause. He shrugged and went back to laying beside her, pulling her into his arms. "Who cares? We can have another one." he teased.

She slapped his chest carefully, "Bailey _just _got you, it wouldn't be fair to have another to distract you from her."

"Trust me," Sean teased, smiling down at Emma, "Nothing can take me away from my girls."

Emma tried not to blush and she bit her lip. He stared down at it and ran his thumb over her lower lip. "I love you." he whispered.

"I love you too." she said.

"don't ever leave me. Never again."

"Treat me right Sean Cameron, and you'll get to keep me forever."

He closed his eyes in bliss as she cuddled closer and he held her tigther, "Til death do us part."

...and on that note, you knew what their next plans were together. And they lived happily, ever after.


End file.
